So we left off on Monday with Michael having initiated the DTR (Define the Relationship) discussion which ended in us officially become a couple, going "steady" if you will for those older readers out there. This was the Fall semester of my Freshman year of college at MSU and Michael's Sophomore year. Michael was my first boyfriend since early my sophomore year of high school, so this was all fairly new ground for me. Our dating basically consisted of MSU football games, BSU functions, outings with our friend group, and cooking dinner together. We just enjoyed each other's company doing whatever it is there was to do.
Oddly enough, the thing that began to irk me about our relationship was that we really didn't fight. Whatever I wanted, Michael did his best to do. I must confess that there were times I purposefully tried to make him mad just to see what he would do, but he never got angry with me. Looking back, I think I was just a little freaked out because I liked him more than I was ready to admit and was subconsciously trying to sabotage the relationship. You see, I had this idea that I would go to college and be this whole new person. This new person would date lots of different boys, but all of a sudden I was in this exclusive relationship. It just wasn't what I had envisioned college to be like. Blame it on TV, blame it on my high school experience, whatever you blame it on, that is what I thought college should be like.
So after eons of debate, which I am sure my room-mate Lauren and friend Ginny tired of hearing, I was finally presented with a turning point. I am not sure who said this to me, but someone finally said, "Mary Beth, if you are so unsure about this relationship, break up with him". So again the debating in my mind begins. I finally reach a potentially life-altering decision.
The week before Thanksgiving break, I sat down with Michael on the couch in his trailer and broke up with him. Ironically, I told him that I didn't think it was right to date someone you could not see yourself marrying, and I didn't see myself marrying him. Looking back, the situation was crazy. I'm sitting on the couch balling my eyes out breaking up with him, and he is soothing ME rubbing my back!! I was the one hurting him! I should have seen right then what a wonderful man I was letting slip through my fingers.
Again, ironically, we ended up in the same place that night. All of our friends were mutual. When he left with a close friend of mine to get some dinner, I felt a pang of jealousy. I think that was when I began to realize I had made a huge mistake even though I wasn't ready to admit it. Shortly after, everyone went home for Thanksgiving break. I thought this would be helpful because we would be apart and could move on. I didn't really ever give myself a chance to do that. I think we talked everyday. That was probably the only time I wasn't crying!
When I finally admitted to myself that I really cared about him and didn't want to be apart, my biggest fear was this: his family will hate me forever! What boy's mother could ever like the girl who broke her son's heart? I was wrong on that note too. At least, I'm pretty sure the Ketchums love me.
We ended up arranging to watch the Egg Bowl together with other friends, Ginny and Jay. We all ended up back at my house after the game to watch a movie. Michael and I sat on the "chair and a half". By the end of the movie, we're holding hands under the blanket. A good sign. He leans over and whispers, "Does this mean we're back together?" I nodded and said, "we'll talk about it later".
Obviously, we got back together and haven't been apart since.
THE NIGHT I FELL IN LOVE
The next significant point in our relationship comes in what I think was February. I am old now, and my memory is fading! HAHA. Either way, it was shortly after Christmas in 2004. We had been dating for four months (we didn't start over at the break-up...just pretended it didn't happen!). Michael was staying at my house for church the next morning. For some reason, I got this great idea to play 20 questions or something like it. We just kept taking turns asking each other ridiculous, funny, and serious questions about the past, likes, dislikes, dreams, and the future. Somewhere around 2 AM over a piece of chocolate cake, I knew I was in love with this boy. I'm not sure when he knew. You'll have to ask him.
Come back tomorrow for: It's a Love Story: The Proposal!
PS: That problem earlier in the relationship of Michael never arguing with me--don't have it anymore! He definitely doesn't let me get my way all the time anymore, which strangely is one of the things I love about him!
